Setting Goals and seeing them through.

"The Success Method"

Do you want a new job? Want to learn to drive? Want to become more successful? Or maybe this is your year to lose weight, to give up smoking or finally stop biting your nails.

Setting goals for ourselves is something we all do. Whether these are personal goals, professional, long or short term I'm sure that we are all familiar to some degree of this process. Why then, if this is such common practice, do so many people have difficulty achieving their goals and making the changes they want in their lives?

 

In our NLP and hypnosis practice in New York, we often see clients who want to make changes in their lives. They usually come with a strong view about what they want to stop doing, or stop feeling and yet they do not always have a clear idea of what they want instead. For example, we frequently hear phrases such as "I don't want to feel this anger" or " I don't want to feel nervous", or “I want to stop smoking” or “I want to stop overeating”.

"The Success Method" that we use at IPH with our clients and in our NLP training, is a two step process. It involves helping a client to set a precise clear goal and then provides a method of maintaining the energy, motivation and focus in order to accomplish it.

The first step when goal setting is to ensure that the goal fits into the NLP model of well-formedness.

NLP teaches that focusing solely on a problem maintains the problem, and that attention must be redirected to a more Resourceful state. In order to redirect the Client's attention, ask:

What do you want instead?

How will you be feeling when you're not feeling this way?

We guide a client in setting their goal, to make it specific and ensure that it is "well-formed"

In NLP, Well formed outcomes are:

Stated in the positive i.e. what you want, rather than what you don't want

Under your control not the control of another person, for example “I want to be an interesting person” (which is under your control), rather than “ I want people to like me” (which is not)

Evidenced through the senses (seen, heard or felt) when attained

Have a defined time frame.

Is ecological

Once this has been established we are ready to move to step 2.

The second phase of the "Success Method" is based on the “Beyond Goals Model” ™ designed by John Overdurf.

All too often, goals are set and yet somehow after a while they just seem to loose their spark, the energy flows out and the goal is left on the shelves to gather dust with all the others! How many times have you made a New Years Resolution only to have given up on it by Valentines Day, or each years “review” at work surprises you with goals you had decided on, only to get swept away and forgotten over the passing months.

When we initially set a goal it is something we really want, we are keyed up and excited about it. However a major stumbling point and reason that goals fail it that we set goals that are either to far in the future or just too big. In order to achieve them, we need to focus our energy for such an extended period of time on a specific goal, which is often just too hard. Maintaining that level of energy can be exhausting and all too soon, the desire wanes and the goal is relegated to that dusty shelf of forgotten dreams.

Maintaining focus and energy is key to success and the “Beyond Goals Model”™ is designed specifically to do this in a unique manner. I have outlined the model here in a simplified way:.

Once a goal has been set, then the question is asked:

“When you have achieved X, how will you be as a person?”

This question helps the client to step into themselves as the future Achiever and really experience the sensations of what it feels like. We usually see our clients just begin to glow at this stage and some kind of physiological shift is exactly what we are looking for to ensure that the client is experiencing this.

This sensation/feeling/shift is called the End State Energy (ESE) and becomes the driving force that propels and motivates the client towards their goal.

Now with this End State Energy clearly experienced, we ask the client “what is the Smallest Next Step (SNS) you need to take to achieve your goal?”

By ensuring that the Smallest Next Step really is a small one, the chances of it being accomplished are strong and the sense of achievement drives the client into continuing their journey toward the outcome. The energy increases instead of dissipating. Each SNS is of course a ‘mini-goal” and has to fit into the well-formed outcome model for it to work well.

Within this basic outline lie many complexities and we certainly use any number of other techniques in order to support and enhance this change work.

At the International Center for Positive change and Hypnosis in New York, we have found that our “Success Method” truly helps our clients achieve the success they really want.

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© 2009 International Center for Positive Change and Hypnosis